How Does a Sex Addict Become Rigorously Honest?

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So, how do you as a recovering sex addict I start the process of rigorous honesty?

1. You start, and I say start, by being honest and by becoming rigorously (rigorously being strict and rigid) in your honesty. You do this by first admitting you are powerless over your unwanted obsessive compulsive sexual behaviors…

2. You make this statement to someone who understands what you’re going through. Ideally it’s in a 12 Step program. It can be with a therapist, clergy, doctor, friend or a trusted family member. It’s you being honest enough to say, I’m done, I’m in trouble, I’m struggling and it’s time for me to be honest so I can begin the journey to getting help and becoming whole.

When you speak the truth it’s easy to remember. When someone asks how your day was or what you did yesterday, there will be no need to lie about where you were, what you were doing, who you were doing it with, etc.

3. Find an SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous), SLAA (Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous) or SA (Sexaholics Anonymous) meeting; these are meetings where other people struggling with the same issues go to recover. Go and be honest about your struggle.

From this first Step at being honest, you need to look at all areas of your life and start living a life of honesty, integrity, fairness, sincerity, adherence to the facts and rules.

It wasn’t until I went to a meeting of SAA and said, My name is Scott and I’m struggling with sex addiction and I need help, that I finally got honest and made the decision to do what it took to get well.

It’s time to grow up, become mature, live a life filled with truth, honesty, respect. That’s it. It’s simple but not easy. You’ll hear that phrase often throughout your journey of recovery…It’s simple, but not easy.

So next time you feel like lying or you do lie, try evaluating why you lied and if it was really necessary. You can stop lying and become honest. And by the way, omission can also be considered a form of lying.

Once you begin to lead a life of rigorous honesty, you don’t have to work so hard at remembering what you said. You just get to live in the moment. You won’t have to protect your life of secrets and lies once you get into recovery. And it makes living life much easier and more enjoyable.

Be patient. Many of us have been lying for years and it’s become automatic. Just be aware of it and work on making small steps to changing that behavior.
What choice(s) will you make today to be honest? Share your thoughts and comments below

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